Firstly, I want to say a massive thank you to you @Jade for passing on my message. I was worried everyone would think I had abandoned them and I knew I was not up to coming on the site so, Jade was wonderful and really supportive.
Thank you to everyone who sent on such lovely messages. I was worried about losing friendships I made through Lidl.
You are all so important to me but I was having trouble finding time, staying positive and basically being able to see by the time I opened up my laptop as I was so tired.
I have tried to come on here several times but found myself getting upset, or my mind just wandering back to Dad.
I felt selfish for not getting in touch with everyone, I am so sorry but it has been difficult.
Dad had a massive heart attack within 48 hours of our return from Scotland, the doctors have said to take one day at a time and just make Dad as comfortable as possible.
We are very lucky as Dad had his first heart by pass when he was 39 and it was quite rare for them to be successful back then. Dad came out of his operation well but we were told Dad would only be with us for about 10 years.
Since then Dad has had various other heart operations, stents placed in his arteries and another by pass about 13 years ago.
Dad will be 80 in July, he doesn't really care about the outcome of any of his health issues now because he wants to be with my Mum as he misses her so much. Mum always said he was too wicked to die
Dad had another heart attack last Friday but it was no where near as bad as the last one.
He is on the mend again but I dread the phone ringing in case its bad news.
I have a son who has been really great and has been staying with my Dad because he is trying to help reduce the strain on me as well as being their for his grandad, he has been amazing.
I can't guarantee I will be on here every day at the moment but I will have a look in when I can and I'll answer messages asap. Don't think I am ignoring any of you.
@Jade I want you to know how wonderfully supportive you have been and how great it was to speak to you on Friday.
I felt like I was going to fall to pieces then I heard from you and you gave me the strength to get through the day with Dad. You have so much on your plate @Jade, I know things have been really difficult for you but you have been so brilliant to me, thank you so much.
@Barb, you have been a rock to me, I have burdened you with so much but you have still treated me as a friend, you are a very special person in my life. It would be great to get together when you are this way but at the moment I can't make any plans. Thank you for being such a wonderful person and an amazing friend to me.
Thank you just doesn't seem to be enough, you have all been such great friends which has helped me get through the days and very long nights by just knowing you have been there for me.
You are a phenomenal bunch of people and you make my life so much easier by just being there for me.
I have always said you are my second family and I am right, you have been like true relatives. I know how great it is to be part of a close family because I have a special close family all under the heading of 'the House of Lidl'.
I wish I could see you all and give you a big hug each but for now I am sending you all my love and a massive virtual hug X X X X XX
So good to see you back here @tommiesgirl There is no need to thank us as you have been here for when we have needed it too. Never feel that you are letting people down as that is not in your nature, Tommiesgirl.
Just know that we are here for you anytime you need us.
Sending lot's of love and hugs to you and your family. OOOO XXXX
So good to hear from you @tommiesgirl We would never think you had deserted us as you have helped so many of us through our bad times. You just have to try and remain positive for Dad and respect his wishes. Above all, as you told me, look after yourself as well. You will be no good to anyone if you get run down. Lots of love and best wishes
So glad to see you feel up to popping in and out @tommiesgirl
Just something to remember:
Friends are like stars you do not need to see them to know they are there.
Dad is being positive, he seems to be in good spirits most of the timebut he takes so many tablets his moods change quickly.
I thought I would let you know that I have taken up a bit of a hobby while Dad has been poorly. I have spent so much time sitting watching Dad breathe and my mind goes straight to the thought of losing him. So I decided to do some knitting for the SCUBU department of our hospital to fill the time.
Apparently the reason so many babies lay in the incubators just wearing nappies is because of the shortage of clothing to fit such tiny babies.
To help keep their temperatures right they need hats, and booties mainly. I have been making matching hats, mittens and bootees but they are so tiny.
When I had my last baby, many moons ago , I visited the premature baby unit and remember seeing a baby laying on the hand of the midwife. It didn't look real but he was a real little fighter.
I hope to get onto knitting the rest of the babies clothing if I can, but at least something good came out of my time with Dad
I just snapped a few on my bedside table for you to see